An expat's view of Taiwan's cultural quirks

Taiwan's Dos

• Riding a bike while carrying an opened umbrella, while its not raining, to block the sun and also the view of where your going or who you’re riding into – acceptable
• Wearing a mini skirt all the way up to your non-existent butt – acceptable
• Locking a two year old out of the classroom and watching him cry all alone in the hallway for not being able to put on his shoes fast enough (by himself mind you, and he’s 2!) – highly acceptable
• Serving kidney beans atop of lentils, atop of mangos covered in some sugary syrup atop a pile of ice shavings – acceptable and popular
• Children remaining in school from 9am until 9pm at night if not longer before going home and doing homework until midnight- acceptable
• Drinking alcohol freely in public areas – acceptable (just not on the subway)
• Driving children around on scooters without helmets, seat belts and or anything strapping them in in any way – acceptable
• Driving like a crazed maniac on your scooter down the sidewalk at 60 miles an hour almost running over a class of toddlers – acceptable
• Garbage trucks playing misleading ice cream truck music, only to be a garbage truck – acceptable
• Taking your pet bunny, unleashed, to the beach or the neighborhood restaurant to hop freely amidst the other diners – acceptable
• Dressing as a power ranger to go surfing - acceptable
• Being 95 degrees out when its only June or raining for 48hrs non-stop - acceptable, apparently really normal
  

Don'ts

• Daring to drink water on the subway – not acceptable
• Showing shoulder or back skin, let alone cleavage! – not acceptable
• Serving beans in a savory fashion – not acceptable
• Maintaining awareness of those around so as not to maim or potentially kill them while, walking, biking or scootering – not acceptable
• Having garbage cans for public use in public areas – not acceptable (yet somehow the streets are so clean!)
  
• Using toilet paper and then flushing it down the toilet – not acceptable
• Swimming in water over 2 ft high – not acceptable
• Making pizza without topping it with corn – not acceptable
• Putting a leash on your dog before leaving the house or while crossing major traffic intersections – just not necessary

Lastly,

• Being exceedingly nice and accommodating to the stupid American slaughtering your language, getting annoyed at your culture she chose to live in and expecting you to help her lost, confused, giant butt regardless – accepted and dealt with more politely than any New Yorker could ever muster